Jan. 7th, 2016

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I crossed the river yesterday to go and run my (very) occasional west-side game out by Kamm's. What I do is I catch the Green or the Blue train at Buckeye and go to tower city to eat at the (still cyberpunk to me) food court. The McDonalds there is closed now! I don't know quite what it is - but seeing a McDonald's close gives me a feeling like - the good guys are winning. Maybe it goes back to when I slayed the Blockbuster? But I felt it, the good guys are winning. Fuck you McDonald's.
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Today's lesson starts out talking about ordering off the menu at McDonald's (probably) and they talk about this secret item on the menu called the Meat Mountain uhhh. Now I know a little about this - ordering off the menu - what I heard was the McGang-bang which... I see why they wouldn't mention that in this pamphlet about learning the bible. I wonder if anyone at the fast-food knows about the Meat Mountain. If it is a real secret.

The idea they talk about though is the notion of Xtianity being the hip secret of the down cool guys. Not Christianity exactly but the specific aspects of it that are inherited from the mystery traditions of the ancient Mediterranean. Religious mysteries are one of those things that lingers in the collective unconcious - there's an idea that there is a secret and that it can be revealed and that secret operators know these secrets.

I went to the Mormon Temple in Kirtland - just to do, we were driving around in her car with nowhere special to be and we saw it and though - let's go. They did a tour and then the mormon pilgrims all took turns talking about their mormonism. We did our best to be gracious- but I'd never known how weird the LDS church was, like - in it's shape & dimensions - they had two auditorium style choirs facing each other- symmetrical - and they referred to these with esoteric Semitic names - I didn't know nothing about it and there I was with the initiated, the Elders- they call you an elder when you're like 17, and I guess - saints? Secret religions.

As well, we explored the abandoned Masonic Temple in Newburgh - that was pretty effing cool. As places to go. I think B sold a bunch of photos of this tuxedo shirt that was hanging on the wall. I took that same picture but... Well I'm not B so I don't have...sales. In an upper room there were the wood-paneled lockers, the sort you see at the higher end country club- and they were down at the heels, of course - abandoned building after all. In them there were a lot of ladies pumps but in very large sizes - like my size. Ritualized shamanic cross-dressing! At least that's what I concluded. Secret rites have a whole evocative power. Secrets seem to have a halo of truth to them and that is interesting to consider - how much credence is given to secrets over more broadly accessible information.

There's a few assumptions at work in this kind of scenario and they're interesting to investigate right? First - you don't trust the main-stream of information, second you innately trust secret information. This paradigm is really strong in Xtian identity - but in a lot of subcultural groups too. I was into Jesus before it was cool, I was into Meat Mountain before anyone knew about it.

I can't pretend I don't like secret areas - I have a whole lifestyle built around exploring and going to them. But secret information? That's weird right? Like- there's a notion that you'll solve it all with the Key Harmonic of the Universe, that you can learn the Anti-Life-Equation or whathaveyou. When I was a kid my mom played this game with me and my brother and sister -we each had a secret. This was just something we whispered to her and each of us had our own - our little shibboleth. My brother, he told us all, and bear in mind - we were really little - "A bunny is a rabbit." He would say - "It's my secret."

I have my own - only my mother will ever know it - I can keep a secret! Lesson learned, thanks mother! But I can tell you that it is similarly nonsensical to my brothers. Secret =/= true, but that's somehow not the actual default consideration.
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In retrospect maybe it was this kind of secret keeping that taught me to be more suspect of secret knowledge than of well described knowledge.

The bible-verse that's referenced has to do with Jesus knowing about a secret sustenance that maintains him and his disciples being characteristically stupid - they always carry the idiot ball so he can illustrate points with Zero Subtlety - it's functional? But it gets old. "Here is my metaphor." "Duhhh Whasit mean boss?" "Here is a partial explanation of my metaphor." "Uh, Boss whatchu talkin' bout?" "Here is where I explain a joke I told you." "Lemme get my pen boss I'ma rite that down so people 2000 years from now can make fun of me on the internet."

What's amusing to me - about this bit- the disciples and Jesus - they're going hungry and worried about eating - but it all comes right on the heels of them getting thrown outta town for making outrageous/blasphemous claims.

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