(no subject)

You've been so patient about learning the Fourth Magic word but you never did wonder why I never mentioned any girls in the story about the King of the Fairies. I mean, there's a Fairy King for ever tribe of fairies, and every plant and flower has its own tribe - but where are the queens? (I mean, here I am telling this story to a little girl - why do you think I wouldn't tell about the girls in the story?)

Well after his problems with the Cactus Fairies, and later on with the King of the Dandelions - the King of all Fairies decided that what he really needed to do was be more responsible. He decided that he would go to the Fairy's forest every weekend. All week long he went to his work, and came home, made his dinners and watched his shows. He would go out with his friends and meet new people, but on the weekends he would go to the woods to check on the fairies and make sure that they were alright. His biggest day for checking up on the Fairies was Saturday.

Now one Friday night he went out with a lady he had met. The King of the Fairies had been trying to meet the right kind of lady for a while, and usually he went on dates on Fridays. He would wear his magical fairy clothes that made him seem handsomer, he would drink the fairy drink that his best friend the King of the Pumpkins would make for him and he would go and have a nice time. But every time he would remember that the next day he would have to rule over all the Fairies and he would start to think about that too much and he would ignore the lady that he was with and she would get mad and he would go home, still thinking all about the Fairies. "Well, it's not as if I could explain any of this to a lady anyway. I guess I'll just..." And then the King of the Fairies wouldn't say anything else, because he sometimes felt very sad and lonesome, knowing no-one would understand about his job as the King of the Fairies.

Well one Saturday morning he was walking into the forest and he was feeling kind of lonesome about it all and he noticed that all of the Fairies he'd ever seen and met were boys. That seemed confusing to him so he decided that he would ask the Fairy Kings about it all. He walked down the path to the fairy circle, which was a series of stones and vines and trees and little mounds of earth stacked up in concentric rings. In the middle of the ring was a treestump that had been dressed up a little to look like a chair, and that's where he would sit and talk to the Fairy Kings. He was sitting in his chair and the King of the Oak Fairies came to talk to him, along with his friend the King off the Rose Fairies. These two were very prestigious and grand as far as the Fairy Kings went, and they were both very dignified. They had noticed that the King of all the Fairies was kind of sad and so they wanted to speak to him.

"What's wrong King?" Asked the Oak-Tree King.

"Do you need us to help you in some way?" Asked the Rose-Flower King.

"Hey!" Said the King of the Fairies, who suddenly thought of something to ask them. "Where are all the girl fairies? How come its just boys?"

At this the two Fairy Kings were very upset! They grew pale and their little faces were drawn into serious expressions. Together they said - "King of the Fairy Kings! Please never speak about this!"

"About girl fairies?"

"Oh! Please don't say anything about them!" And now the King of the Blackberries and the King of the Lilacs were saying it too. Their flower crowns fell off their heads and they clutched at their leaf-capes and stamped their twig staves on the ground. "Don't you know that it is springtime now! If you speak of them they might hear! And then they might appear!"

"The girl fairies? Where are they?"

But the Fairy Kings were now terribly exercised about it! They jumped up and shouted and yelled and then ran away to hide. Fairies are terribly good at hiding and that's why you might never have met one before. They ran off and hid themselves and the King of the Fairies was sitting in the circle all by himself.

Well he went home after that and started trying to think about what the Fairy Kings had said. "They come back in the spring?" Said the King of the Fairies to himself as he made a grilled cheese sandwich. "They come back every year?" He thought as he watched his TV shows. "I think that maybe the girl fairies have something to do with birds." He muttered to himself as he read a book at bedtime. "I'll go tomorrow and try to find out. If they're so upset It's something that I need to do something about."

And that's just what he did. The next day he fixed himself a lunch and carried it down the path toward the Fairy Circle. He passed many stick scarecrows that hadn't been there before, and many twig golems and rock piles and there were strings hanging from many branches - the woods seemed spooky and a little dangerous then, and the King of the Fairies was surprised about it. When he got to the Fairy Circle the kings of the fairies had gotten out the grass-blade swords and their shiny leaf shields. They were dressed in their birch-bark armor and they had their acorn-cap helmets on. "Oh my goodness!" Said the King of the Fairies. "Are you going to try and fight each other again?" He was anxious that they might and he grabbed at his magic wand and started to think about which magic word he would use.

"No, no!" Said the King of the Pumpkins, who wasn't wearing any armor and had no sword. The King of the Pumpkins, aside from being a great chef, and a funny fat fairy, and the King of the Fairies best friend, was a famous coward who would never ever fight. "No, there have been sightings of the Girl Fairies and now we have to prepare to drive them off again."

This surprised the King of the Fairies. "Aren't you excited to meet ladies?" He wondered, confused. Then he thought about how the Fairies had acted before and he wondered if they weren't like little human boys who are sometimes scared of girls and sometimes try to drive them off as well. The Fairies, you know, aren't like people very much, but when they are they're often like human children, because they throw tantrums and fight for no reason and have very elaborate feelings.

"No!" Said the King of the Pumpkins, we're all very afraid of them! They're terribly fierce!" And with that the King of the Pumpkins jumped up into the King of the Fairies pocket - which was after all probably the safest spot of all for a Fairy.

Suddenly a whirlwind of birds came flying down into the Fairy Circle. There were hundreds and hundreds of birds, from the buzzards to the robins to the sparrows and the blue jays. They all descended in a gust of wind and they perched on the trees and stones of the Fairy Circle. The King of the Fairies noticed that the birds all perched made the circle seem much more pretty and interesting, like something that had been missing before but which he hadn't noticed till it had been added. It was a very exciting spectacle and all the birds sang together at once. The Kings of the Fairies were not pleased however, they were very alarmed and they began to draw their swords and beat their shields, for on the back of every bird riding around its neck was a girl fairy.

Now while the Kings of the Fairies were very regal and always dressed in their fancy fairy clothes, these fairies were wild looking. They had feathers tied in their hair and around their necks they had neclaces of knuckebones. They each carried lassos and their faces were painted and they howled and laughed and were very, very bold. "Oh Ho! Fairy Kings!" They all shouted. "You'd better not think of fighting us with your little swords and armor! We'll catch you up and make you our servants Fairy Kings!"

The Fairy Kings charged at them with their shiny grass-blade swords and their gleaming leaf-shields. But the Fairy Queens all flew up into the air and lassoed the hapless fairy kings. They captured them all and tied them up in a flash! The Fairy Kings were no match for their bird riding counterparts. One of the Fairy Queens, the Queen of the Crow Tribes strutted through the Fairy Ring. She had a long gown made of black feathers and here wild hair was knotted with little stones and bones. She carried a sabre made of a maple-seed and she laughed and laughed. "You foolish fairy kings, you've been caught! You were silly to try and fight us and now! Now! You'll be our servants! You'd better get to work making us some beautiful fairy clothes and fixing us some delicious fairy drinks! You'd better feed our birds and build their nests or we'll carry you off into the sky!" She strutted around in front of them laughing and swinging her sabre with bold flourishes.

Finally seeing what was what the King of the Fairies knew he had to intervene. Being the King of the Fairies after all meant that he was in charge of protecting them. So he stood up and bellowed in his deepest most kingly voice: "These Kings of the Fairies are nobodies servants! You'd better fly off again fairy queens or I'll use my magic to turn you into something you wouldn't like! Or I'll make you vanish forever!" He threatened them with this and he pointed his magic wand right at the Queen of the Crows who stared back at him with fierce defiant eyes.

The Queen of the Grackles who's hair rose up in a wave and was green and iridiscent, and who wore tattered black pants over her yellow legs hopped forward. "You think you're so smart Fairy Boys! To have a human king, well we've got a queen of our own! And she'll be here tomorrow to set everything right! You'll be sorry you tried to stop us then boys!" She sneered this and then jumped on her grackle who chirped and danced and flew away into the sky along with all the other birds in a terrible whirlwind that shook the trees and stirred up the earth.

Well the Kings of the Fairies were very troubled. "They'll bring their queen tomorrow! What will you do?" Then they got excited, and then they got happy. "Punch her in the nose!" They started chanting. "You'll be bigger than her and stronger too!" Said the King of the Burdock. "Punch her in the nose and beat her up!"

But the King of the Fairies was excited, not because he would ever, ever try and fight anyone, but because he thought it might be wonderful to meet a lady who knew about the fairies. "Do you think she'll be pretty?" He asked the King of the Pumpkins who was still hiding in his pocket.

"Who knows anything?" Said the Pumpkin King as he jumped down to the ground to hide once again. "Who can say, but she'll be fierce and it would be better that you drove her off than made friends with her and that's the truth."

Well the King of the Fairies went home to think about it, and he watched his shows and did his laundry. He made himself an extra big cup of the fairy drink and in the morning after his breakfast he put on his fanciest fairy suit and tied his tie and checked himself in the mirror an extra time. He was very excited to meet the Queen of the Fairies and he was certain that he could talk her out of letting the Fairy Girls bully the Fairy Boys. He walked into the woods and there were hundreds of singing birds now, and all the blooming flowers, the whole woods was prettier and nicer than it had ever been before. He walked down to the Fairy Circle and there the trees and flowers and birds and rocks were all arranged in a splendid pattern. The Fairy Queens were strutting around in the middle and the Fairy Kings were armed and standing around the edge of the circle.

"Well Fairies? Where's the Queen of the Fairies?" Said the King of the Fairies as he sat down on his tree-stump throne.

"I'm here!" Shouted the Queen of the Fairies. It could only be the Queen of the Fairies! She flew from out of the sky, hundreds of birds of every type had been tied together by colorful ribbons and string and they were tied to her! She swept down out of the sky and she wore a gown made of the feathers of every bird, it was iridescent and sparkling and it had every color in it. Her face was painted fiercely and she had many feathers knotted into her long hair. She had dirty bare feet and carried the longest feather in the world like a walking stick. She swept down into the circle and released her cloud of birds who flew off in every direction trailing their ribbons and strings of every color. Up close the King could see that the Queen of the Fairies was shorter than him and that she smelled like the weather and the rain - like a lightning storm and electricity.

"Listen up Fairy King, you'd better give up this idea you have of trying to stop my ladies. We've come back like we do every year, and this time all you fairy boys are caught. You're going to do what you are told. Make the nests, clean the perches and make our clothes and suppers. You'd better or we'll snatch you up and take you to our court in the clouds!" The Queen of the Fairies strutted and pointed and shouted in the boldest way possible. She lifted her feather cane up over her head and twirled it around. Finally she stopped and pointed it right at the King of the Fairies. "And you'd better not try and stop me or I'll carry you up to the sky and drop you down to the ground King of Fairies."

Well this was not what the Fairy King had expected. Here was the Queen of the Fairies and she was a human person just like him - but she acted like the most misbehaved Fairy of all. He was a little dispirited because he had been hoping to make a friend. But he was used to dealing with the childishness of Fairies and so he said, in a calm, steady voice - "Alright Queen of Fairies. You listen up. I'm responsible for the Plant Fairies and I won't have them bullied by you or anyone else. I'll give you a little while to think about this, but I'm warning you, if you don't leave these boys alone I'll use my magic," And here he took out his magic wand and pointed it right at her, "and no-one will ever know who you were. Understand? I don't want a problem but if you keep making one, I'll solve it any way that I can."

The Queen of the Fairies did not like having the magic wand waved at her. She grew pale and concerned, and the Fairy Queens on their birds began shrieking and hooting and howling at him. The Fairy Kings though were very excited again and began clanging their swords and shields.

"Now. If you want to talk about this like a King and a Queen then you can come to my house later and we'll discuss it. Otherwise I'll turn you into a pig, an invisible pig if I have to." And with that the King of the Fairies left the circle and went home. He was suddenly very tired and a bit distressed. All along he had hoped to make a friend and here he'd met someone who seemed determined to be his enemy.

When he got home he found the Pumpkin King sitting around his house. Because the Pumpkin King was his dear friend and was always afraid of fights he often hid out at the King of the Fairies' house in times of trouble. "Listen my friend." Said the Pumpkin King. "You know, you have a fourth magic word you could try and use. You know what it is."

"I won't do that!" Said the King of the Fairies.

"Just think about it though." Said the Pumpkin King, and then he left, because he could hear the birds shrieking outside the house and knew that the Queen of the Fairies had followed the King home.

There was a knock at the door and the King of the Fairies answered it. It was the Queen. She was not bold and strutting, instead she said hello and put out her hand to shake. "Hello," said the King of the Fairies. "Would you like to come inside to talk?"

"I never go inside, I hate to be trapped inside of walls and under roofs." Explained the Queen of the Fairies, and she spoke in a friendlier way than he had expected. "Can we talk out here on your porch?"

"Uh, yeah, that's fine!" Said the King of the Fairies, a little surprised. "Wait there and I'll make some fairy drink." Which is what he did. He brought back the fairy drink and they sat on the porch to enjoy it together.

"So, I'm sorry I was so mean before." Said the Queen of the Fairies. "I'm not really that way, well, not always, but when I'd heard that the Fairy Kings had gotten a King I was worried that you would try and lord it over me."

"I still might if you try and bully the Fairy Kings you know."

"I'm sure you would, but you wouldn't do it just to be in charge. You're a good king, I can tell, you're only trying to look out for the Plant-Fairy-Tribes."

"That's true."

"The Bird Fairy Tribes don't have magic wands and the only magic words I know are to help me fly and to live up in the sky. I really love it there."

"I'm sure it's very wonderful. You never come back to the land? You never live inside of a house?"

"No! I hate it!" The Queen of the Fairies laughed and drank her fairy drink. "I always wanted to live in the sky and that's why I'm a good queen to the Bird Fairies. But there is a problem."

"Well, maybe I can help you."

"Maybe. Listen. You've dealt with the Fairies and you know that if you spend too much time around them you can get caught up and have too much emotions and maybe act like a fairy too much. You can get carried away with the magic and everything. That's true."

"That is true." The King of the Fairies agreed.

"Well, I have the same problem with people." She explained. "If I spend too much time around them I could forget how to fly, or forget how to go back into the sky, and I really love it there and never want to come to the ground."

"Well, then I don't understand why you've come to the ground in the first place. Why make this problem!" The King of the Fairies was enjoying their conversation and they talked for a while about the way that it was, to be the ruler over the tribes of the Fairies. He learned that the Bird Fairies don't fight with each other the way the Plant Fairies do. He learned that all of the Fairy Girls are fairies of birds and sometimes bugs and insects, and all of the boy fairies were Fairies of plants and flowers. They talked and talked till it grew very late at night and they had drunk almost all of his fairy drink. In the end she still didn't tell him why the Girl Fairies had come and so he asked her again - "Why come to the land and start this war?"

"Well." She said with a yawn. It was late and the moon was almost setting. "You know how they aren't like us. Like people. Well, the Girl Fairies used to come back here every spring to choose husbands, and then the Boy and Girl fairies would have families - babies who get planted in the ground like seeds or raised in nests like birds. But the Fairy Queens have decided that since I'm their queen they won't meet husbands unless I do. But I'm not a fairy, I'm a person and I don't want to meet a husband."

"I see, that makes sense." Said the King of the Fairies. "What kind of a husband could you have if you had to still live up in the sky."

"Exactly!" Said the Fairy Queen, "And I don't want to live in a house on the ground or be like all the other people. I want to be the way that I am. Well, that's a problem for the Fairy Queens, because they say that they won't marry unless I do, and so they can't marry because I won't and that's made them very fierce. They bully the boys now instead of marrying them. Really it's my fault, but if I do what they need me to do I'll have to stop being their Queen, and then no one will look after them!"

"That is a problem. I understand what it is like to have to be in charge of Fairies. Well. I can think about this for you, if you want, and then tomorrow I'll have an idea. We should meet in the circle again tomorrow."

"Alright, I agree." And with that, and with another big yawn, the Queen of the Fairies grabbed the strings of her cloud of birds and soared up to her home in the sky again.

Now, the sneakiest and most cunning of the Fairy Kings - the King of the Creeper-Vine Fairies had been at the porch the whole time listening. He had heard what the King of the Pumpkins had said, and he had heard the whole conversation between the Queen and the King of all Fairies. When the King went to bed the Creeper-Vine King came into his room and climbed up on the pillow and started whispering in the Fairy King's ear. "Use the fourth magic word on her!" Said the King of the Creeper-Vine-Fairies.

"You mean the word that makes people fall in love? I don't think I will." Said the King of the Fairies, and he sat up to look at who was talking to him.

"But you should!" Said King Creeper-Vine. "If you do, she'll obey you, and then you can boss her and we can boss the girl fairies and everything will be better."

"I don't think they will be." Said the King of the Fairies. "If I did that, you'd all be terrible bullies yourselves, and I have a responsibility to make sure you act right Creeper-Vine King. And besides, the Queen of the Fairies doesn't want to be in love with me, she doesn't want to live on a house on the ground."

"She will if you use the magic!" The Creeper Vine King was very insistent. He paced around the pillow. "I'll tell the other Kings about this. They won't like that you're not doing your right job! You're supposed ot help us."

"Listen! The Queen of the Fairies isn't even my type!" Protested the King again. "I'm not going to use magic to make that poor girl live the way I do. She doesn't want to!"

"We'll all mutiny for sure! We'll use our magic to turn you into a pig! What will you do then?"

"Well I suppose I'll oink Creeper-Vine King. What will you do?"

The Creeper-Vine King would still not give up though. "I will tell on you if you don't do what I say!" He said again and stamped his little foot.

"Alright." The King of the Fairies was very tired and just wanted to lay down. But he also had a plan. "Tell the Kings and the Queens if you see any, that I'm going to use the fourth magic word tomorrow. You can tell them. But I'm going to sleep now, so get out of my house."

And that is what happened.

The next afternoon, after the King of the Fairies had called his work to tell them that he couldn't come in because of an emergency at his house, he went to the woods and the Fairy Ring there. The Kings of the Plant Fairy Tribes were all there and they all looked very smug. They were lording it over the Fairy Queens who looked a little excited but a little worried to. They were pacing around and the birds they rode on were just as nervous as they were. They chirped little chirps but didn't squawk their big squawks at all. In the middle of the Fairy Circle was the Queen of the Fairies. She must have heard the Creeper-Vine King's rumor because she looked saddest of all. The King of the Fairies just stood at the edge of the circle.

"You must have heard that I'm going to use my fourth magic word for the first time today." He said in his most kingly voice. "I had to miss work for this, so I suppose I should make it a big thing."

There was an uproar among the fairies but he couldn't hear any words or sounds.

"Well. I could call on the lighting to get you. I could turn you into a frog. I could even make you vanish into thin air. But I'm going to use the fourth magic word and make you fall in love Fairy Queen." And then he walked forward toward the Queen and she was very upset she started to round her shoulders and look very sad, but she must have remembered that she was a Queen, because she put her chin up and her chest out and stared at the King of the Fairies ferociously.

"I'm ready." She said.

"I say the magic word and I say that you, Queen of the Fairies! Will fall in love..." And he said the magic word and he tapped her on the forehead with his wand...

"With yourself!" Said the King. "As the King of the Fairies I say you can love yourself best, and if you have to be married, then I, as the King of the Fairies, say that you can be married to the sky, or to yourself or to anyone you want."

Then he looked around at all the Bird Fairies. And so did the Queen. She was very surprised by what had happened, but she suddenly felt very happy about everything, she felt very pleased and it was because she loved herself and was sure of herself. At first the Queens of the Bird-Fairies seemed puzzled, but as the magic took root, and they realized that the Queen of the Fairies had found love at last, they became less fierce. They laughed and hugged the Kings of the Fairies. The Kings of the Fairies laid down their swords and started offering the Queens their fairy drink and their fairy treats. Soon the whole Fairy Ring was just a big picnic, and everyone in it was very happy and content, not the least of them being the Queen and King of all the Fairies.

"You can always come to my porch if you want to." Said the King of the Fairies.

"And you can ask any bird you see to send me a message if you like." Said the Queen of the Fairies.

They were friends then and they still are.

Note:

Here at the end I was asked about which Bird Fairies married which Plant Fairies, and a whole game was made out of it. I said that the sweet and cowardly old Pumpkin King married the Plump and happy Queen of the Chicken Fairies, for instance. So tell me what you think - who goes with whom?