(no subject)
Jul. 12th, 2017 08:16 pmJulie says the moon is heavy & she would know.
What's happened is that the days have gone on too long and been too much & now I'm full & uncontained. See the thing of it started a month ago. With Julie - but that's her story - an interesting one in it's way. She dates the men of the internet incessantly. I describe her to other people and hte word I use is promiscuous - and not in a way that contains or carries shame but in a way that tells a peculiar tale. So she falls in with Hank who lives nearby and after she comes to my house - because of schedules and situations. She wakes up n my couch on a saturday while I'm busy with my own tasks. The day goes on and she's peculiar, all in love for the moment & confused. I learn what I can about Hank and do my part.
My part is to know well enough how to find out all there is to know on the internet. So she finds out what I know about hank and he's a liar. Which makes her go. crazy. She goes crazy, to the point that tacos in the afternoon are nearly ruined. But not, because how could tacos be ruined?
Months go by, I travel and think often of a lady that I love and then there are other things that transpire. It ends up over this weekend, where I'm forlorn, because my lady is away and I'm apart from her and shouldn't be but also she is due to make an effort and refuses. It's a problem of feelings and feelings, you know, are the seat of all problems. I'm a little on the sad side and my kiddo goes - my best & favorite, with her mother - so I'm left alone to be alone and make strange striving efforts.
On the 4th I come home from a party well past midnight - the train being closed - I talk to the driver of the summoned car and we speak about the plight of unfortunate children and we go to past the famous hospital of my neighborhood and she cries a bit, from her, the driver's, prior experiences involving emergency room pediatrics. I have a small quantity of whiskey in my pocket, the end of a bottle that I killed off myself, and we smoke and hug - me and the driver.
Then work & work is tiresome and nearly impossible to care about, and then I go on and out - getting restless - I walk a lot in the city and go & go. In the city. Eventually I make my connection with my new friend Joan - from the city but new here too - we go rowing in a boat on the river and have a picnic at sea - it's a nice day and there are weird old churches and abandoned nunneries along the way and the names of all the streets that make up the tedious puzzle of my day-to-day. I get anxious and sad and want to leave forever.
I go to my niece's 5th birthday at the putt-putt candy factory & then I go rowing on the river & then I go home and then I go to work & in the background it seems that Julie is going off with Hank to have strangely abusive experiences & to be inducted into his religious cult that is based upon color blindness and experiences at a beach in Michigan. She's very foolish and the proof of this is that she doesn't mention any of this to me until after the fact.
She tells the tale -and this might be saturday? Before my river times. We go drinking, hard and long and I meet the man from the lego store and threaten to fight a rugby team and... It's a low style of rampage, a weak day of poor experiences & bad revelations that need deep drunkeness to carry you out of them.
Back to work and back to everything. And anyhow Julie's got problems no-one aught to have and I have nothing like a problem but I miss all the women that my life is built around and hang with the women that are important in their lives but not the stars of my own story. I want a kiss and a long sleep with arms entwined, and to wake in the morning the biggest of little-spoons.
But wine & work instead. Did you know what the long summer could do? And the high-heavy moon?
What's happened is that the days have gone on too long and been too much & now I'm full & uncontained. See the thing of it started a month ago. With Julie - but that's her story - an interesting one in it's way. She dates the men of the internet incessantly. I describe her to other people and hte word I use is promiscuous - and not in a way that contains or carries shame but in a way that tells a peculiar tale. So she falls in with Hank who lives nearby and after she comes to my house - because of schedules and situations. She wakes up n my couch on a saturday while I'm busy with my own tasks. The day goes on and she's peculiar, all in love for the moment & confused. I learn what I can about Hank and do my part.
My part is to know well enough how to find out all there is to know on the internet. So she finds out what I know about hank and he's a liar. Which makes her go. crazy. She goes crazy, to the point that tacos in the afternoon are nearly ruined. But not, because how could tacos be ruined?
Months go by, I travel and think often of a lady that I love and then there are other things that transpire. It ends up over this weekend, where I'm forlorn, because my lady is away and I'm apart from her and shouldn't be but also she is due to make an effort and refuses. It's a problem of feelings and feelings, you know, are the seat of all problems. I'm a little on the sad side and my kiddo goes - my best & favorite, with her mother - so I'm left alone to be alone and make strange striving efforts.
On the 4th I come home from a party well past midnight - the train being closed - I talk to the driver of the summoned car and we speak about the plight of unfortunate children and we go to past the famous hospital of my neighborhood and she cries a bit, from her, the driver's, prior experiences involving emergency room pediatrics. I have a small quantity of whiskey in my pocket, the end of a bottle that I killed off myself, and we smoke and hug - me and the driver.
Then work & work is tiresome and nearly impossible to care about, and then I go on and out - getting restless - I walk a lot in the city and go & go. In the city. Eventually I make my connection with my new friend Joan - from the city but new here too - we go rowing in a boat on the river and have a picnic at sea - it's a nice day and there are weird old churches and abandoned nunneries along the way and the names of all the streets that make up the tedious puzzle of my day-to-day. I get anxious and sad and want to leave forever.
I go to my niece's 5th birthday at the putt-putt candy factory & then I go rowing on the river & then I go home and then I go to work & in the background it seems that Julie is going off with Hank to have strangely abusive experiences & to be inducted into his religious cult that is based upon color blindness and experiences at a beach in Michigan. She's very foolish and the proof of this is that she doesn't mention any of this to me until after the fact.
She tells the tale -and this might be saturday? Before my river times. We go drinking, hard and long and I meet the man from the lego store and threaten to fight a rugby team and... It's a low style of rampage, a weak day of poor experiences & bad revelations that need deep drunkeness to carry you out of them.
Back to work and back to everything. And anyhow Julie's got problems no-one aught to have and I have nothing like a problem but I miss all the women that my life is built around and hang with the women that are important in their lives but not the stars of my own story. I want a kiss and a long sleep with arms entwined, and to wake in the morning the biggest of little-spoons.
But wine & work instead. Did you know what the long summer could do? And the high-heavy moon?