Oct. 28th, 2014

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Morning bathroom picture, en-route to the exit, I think I've got a lean(ish) & hungry look - I feel like it anyway. There's that ringing in the ears that comes of forgetting to eat and then being asked complicated technical questions. Lately I've been getting by on password resets and photo editing. Now, it's back to the rigorous project that I... invented.

In a practical sense it's pretty straightforward, in actuality it just seems out of reach & dreamlike. I've got good practice with interfacing with the idealized & then manipulating it there - but these are theoretical abstractions that are now being made into concrete tools for use by others. It's a lot of explaining & I don't like that, explaining things. Account for yourself! I get grouchy and don't wanna. Tell me how to do a thing that you figured out on your own! Show your work! Hate all of that. But maybe I'm quick & clever? Who can say, sometimes it seems so, sometimes, I'm hungry and I can't believe that I'm capable of language.

Then there's another sales call and then I have to create some kind of flyer and a mailing and then I have to think really hard about data flows.

It's making it hard to even consider how to write this chapter about NPC hirelings - it's making that pretty hard, I have to say - but that's all that's between me and a virtually finished Game of the North players' guide.

And then it'll be november & I'll write a book. I have it figured out even. I have that planned up. Things to do, I can do, just don't make me tell you why or what they're for and for fuck's sake don't expect me to be at a place at a specific time - that's the enemy there. Being Places.

February 2023

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