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Oct. 17th, 2014 10:57 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
kingtycoon
Life forms into predictable, repeatable patterns, everything is mundane and pleasing. Sometimes you have a beer on the front porch with people, some days, most days, you come home and work on something else. Life forms into predictable, repeating patterns. Everything is mundane.
Periodic enthusiasm is curtailed by the prevalence of the commonplace. The ordinary becomes an ongoing monotony that lacks pain and joy. Trouble seems remote, the guard is lowered. At the end of the month I'm going to Columbus to help my brother get married. I hate Columbus so fucking much that I am falling into dread about it. And I am antagonized by the thought of leaving, going and having my pattern interrupted.
Today, I was at the bus-stop. Getting ready to wait, just posting up on the darkened streetcorner- it's tricky & obnoxious crossing the street. I did it. I was just retrieving my reading matter when a car pulls up to the stoplight and the man inside shouts out to me that "The Bus is broken down. Sorry buddy!" And I thought, for a second, well, that's a shame. I said barely something to the guy, and by the time he was through the crowded intersection past the light I'd dismissed his warning. Is he lying, like people in cars do? Probably. Does he even know how many buses come to this stop? No. Which direction was he even coming from before - there's half a dozen buses he could mean. What a dope. Don't talk to me. Here's what I know: Nobody knows what they're talking about. Fools.
I get back to my repeated pattern. I go home. I'll work on this - this thing I'm helping the Public Domain to make. One of the books I'll write this year, the other, that comes later. After Columbus, after getting shaken out of the pattern.
Saturdays we play-test, though they think we just play - to me it's a test, does it work? Am I great. I am great.
20's are rolled.
I can tell, I don't know how, but I can tell, that something's going to change my world. I think in a different way, I think a harder time is looming near. I don't know how I know or why. The pattern is going to break, I can tell.
